Heratio 10.0 on the Richter Scale

Once upon a time there was a fox named Heratio. Heratio was a vicious, terribly evil, yet friendly and good fox. He was mischeivous, yet tended to follow the rules. Well, one day while a-trotting through the forest, he came upon something h...e had never seen before. It was about 16 inches tall. About 5 or 6 inches wide. Silver at the top, silver at the bottom. A liquid gooeyness in the middle. The liquid was blue, and it had small green liquidy balls floatin around inside. He sniffed it. No scent. He licked it. OUCH! It was hot to the touch. Didn't taste like anything though. Since he didn't know what it was, he did the only logical thing possible. He pooped on it. Covered in in ridiculous amounts of fox poop. Until it was covered. Then, aye, enter stage left, a 13 foot tall rabbit comes a-hopping in. He says in a high pitched, yet deep voice "Heratio, what hast thou donest to mine lava lamp? WHere has it gone, and why did you poop where it was?" Heratio answered in fox speak, "When you're sitting in a jet, and you feel a little wet, diarrhea, diarrhea." As a result of those words, Mr. Rabbit instantly imploded into 4 pieces and turned into a 4 pack of diet chocolate soda. Now, Heratio was a sucker for diet chocolate soda, so he drank all the pop. In fact, he even ate the cans. Then he pooped again.

Suddenly, the big pile of poop melted away and lava lamp was back, and he said to Heratio "Heratio, I hate you. You have pooped on me, therefore I will poop on you and your children." And he proceeded to do so.

The next day Heratio was feeling kind of eccentric, so he went to Target and bought everything. Fox... foxes... foxi (what is plural for fox? I think I'll go with foxi). Foxi are rich, don't you know? They have a little pouch on there belly in which there is an endless supply of bottle caps, which they use for currency. Visa is accepted everywhere? I think not. Bottle caps accepted everywhere. I think so. You try going to the Galapagos islands and using your visa there. Aint gonna happen. You need some bottle caps. Thats what you need. So Heratio bought everything in the Target store and stored it in his pouch. You can fit a lot in fox pouches because the inside is like another dimension. It's like a portal to another universe. So Heratio has, like, a lot of stuff in there.

Then Heratio went home and reflected upon what happened, and came to a conclusion: A fox is never to deep fry orange juice on thursdays.